Staying positive can be a tough job, especially when life gives you "one of those weeks". It can definitely feel like when it rains it
pours floods, and these last few weeks have done just that. I thought maybe if I lay it all out there it will feel better to get it off my mind.
So here's how these past 2 weeks went down:
- Almost lost my voice completely and 4 out of 5 Codys have some sort of a cold
- My cold turned into a sinus infection, which led to bronchitis, which led to urgent care, which led to 13 days of sickness
- 2 grandparents ended up in the hospital...both seem to be doing well though!
- Had a mini breakdown regarding the direction of my "career"
- Have seen my husband 2 nights in the last 10
- Realized the boys have a sport 6 nights out of the week during the month of May
- Began realizing I will become a soccer widow in the next month once the hubs starts coaching
So there it is, it's not pretty, but its been my life the last couple weeks! That mixed in with the every day "adventures" of being a part-time working mother of 3 put me over the edge and I had to dig really, really, really deep! How did I dig deep you might ask? Well I had to turn it around and if it meant filling that glass half full myself, well by golly I was going to do it! So here's what I came up with...
- I got healthy and started a new workout program, which is helping to give me some much needed energy!
- The hubs is working out with me so its giving us some "alone" time, even if it means sweating it out. Hey, beggars can't be choosers at this point!
- Sick kiddos meant extra cuddle time and we took advantage of some 1 on 1 time!
- My girlfriend had a new baby and we celebrated a new life and all things pink and frilly!
- I got my overflowing mound of papers organized and put all of the events in my new life planner and it made me confident that I CAN do the day to day even when then hubs is gone!
My biggest struggle these last few weeks has really been the "career" dilemma. I have been really struggling with where I always thought I "should" be at this point in my life and doing what makes me happy. Let me sum up my personality: Type A perfectionist who
likes needs to be creative and likes all things pretty! So when that type of a personality is in a numbers, facts, and spreadsheets type of job, I go crazy...correction, I have
gone crazy! Since I'm married to a very sensible, realistic, frugal hubby the thought of me NOT working scares the you know what out of him. So there is my dilemma, I feel stuck, I feel uncreative, I feel unsuccessful, I feel like I'm wasting my degree, I feel sad...there, I said it! Now I've said it, it's out there, now I move forward.
I'm determined to find what makes me happy, fulfilled, contribute to my family, be with my kids, and have my cake and eat it too! I really took these past couple weeks to climb inside myself and figure out what I need to do to move forward. I think I have a game plan and now it's just up to me to put it into motion! You will all be the first to see this plan unfold and I want to thank you for bearing with me during my craziness and supporting me during my struggle. I'm beginning to see the
light rainbow at the end of the tunnel (hint, hint)!
Cheers,